A Letter To God…

Dear God,

I thank you for giving me 29 years of my life…

I am forever grateful to you for all the blessings and sustenance you’ve showered upon me…

I thank you for giving me a good wife, a lovely daughter, a caring family and great friends to make living worthwhile…

I thank you for all the tests and ordeals you gave to me so that I would learn to be a better person…

I thank you for always looking at me with mercy, even if as a meek and mortal subject, I am prone to committing mistakes and incurring your wrath through my daily sins and actions…

But with gratitude comes a lot of hope…

I hope you would accept my good deeds like how you have accepted those before me…

I hope you would continue to grant me more years in my life, more sustenance, more good health and more blessings…

I hope that you would forgive me for all my wrongdoings over the past 29 years…

I hope that you may continue to be ever more merciful to me, my family and friends…

I hope that you would grant me success in life and in the Hereafter…

Amin… Ya Rabbal ‘Alamin…

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It was not too long ago that I was alone in my room, lying on the floor, twisting and turning, trying to sleep when all the excitement of the following day’s affairs was running through my head. I had spent a good 2-3 hours just forcing myself to sleep. Even though I had psyched myself for what was in store, the adrenaline rush was just getting to me. Exactly 2 years on, here I am, my role in life having being promoted from a single to a married man and now a proud father of one.

Time does fly in the twinkling of an eye. It was just a year ago that we celebrated Hari Raya Haji on this day and another one has passed us almost two weeks ago. Life is indeed short when you think back of the past memories. If ever there was such a thing as a time machine, I’d be the first to sign up and go back to my adolescence just to rectify some of the mistakes I’ve made. Who knows, I could have become a scholar, or realised my dreams of being an entertainer or perhaps by being your favourite friendly deejay on air.

Alas… We’re in reality… And what we do now would shape our destiny. Resolutions??? I almost always seem to have the same ones like losing weight for example, only to realise that come the end of the year, I’ve added on about 5kg. I guess DISCIPLINE is one word that is lacking in my dictionary, which I am inclined to put things right come the new year. As for the others, well, let’s just say it is for my own personal drive towards success. Wish me luck!!!

I might not be the best husband to ever walk on God‘s green Earth. Neither do I show my romantic side to my wife openly. But she should know when she reads this, that I love her very much for always being there for me, for bearing my child, for sacrificing her own personal desires just to see me happy and most importantly for being a loyal and patient partner. 2 years on from the time we walked the aisle, we had our moments of imperfection, but from these experiences, we love each other even more deeply than ever.

Happy 2nd Anniversary Darling, my life would never be complete without you. And for memory’s sake, hope you guys enjoy this lame performance of mine at my wedding dinner. In the meanwhile, here’s wishing everyone Happy New Year!!!

P.S. In case any of you is awaiting any reports or reviews on RIA‘s Band Remix Competition, I apologise for having to disappoint you cos I did not attend the event as my wife and daughter were sick. I saw from my hits that people searched for the review in the search engines hoping to read one from my domain…

When “Hooking Up” Can Be A Bone Of Contention…

I’m on a long leave till the New Year. Nothing of glaring significance have occured since the last entry other than me and the wife would like to take this opportunity to thank my dear bro, Nizam and his wife, sis Ian, for taking the trouble to get Syahindah a lovely gift for her birthday. A nice surprise and definitely one that the little one would cherish when she understands how to play it in due time. She’s not feeling well at the moment to even play her other toys as she’s down with a virus that’s making her vomit and having diarrhoea. This is the first time she’s feeling lifeless and subdued when she’s not feeling well and it’s giving both of us sleepless nights having to tend to her.

Playset

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Anyway, the title above is a rant I’m about to make as I feel that someone is making a mountain out of a molehill and I’m sure most of you would agree that it’s just plain stupid and petty. I assume most of us have hopped onto the Facebook bandwagon by now. And when you’ve successfully added someone, he or she would edit details on how you two met over the course of your lives. One of my recently added contacts was pissed off when I edited details on how we met i.e. “We hooked up because we were neighbours…” I thought it was a harmless enough line which had no distinctive bearing whatsoever but it has proved to be the source of this person’s anger somehow when she sent me a note on my SuperWall for the world to see saying “Why did you write the details of us knowing each other as “we hooked up and that it went down in 1998”??? we NEVER DID – god forbid!!!! seriously, stop creating lies…” and she ended off by saying, “You were just my annoying little neighbour. that is it! jeez…

Well to correct her apparent myopia, I had actually typed 1988 instead of 1998. That was the year I got to know her brother who became my neighbourhood play mate. Jogging my memory back, I don’t think I’ve ever played any practical jokes for her to classify me as “annoying“. Looking through my list of Facebook contacts, I have quite a few friends, male and female, whom I’ve put as “We hooked up through blogging” or “We hooked up through AnakMelayu.com” for example. Does that mean every female I “hooked up” with used to be my girlfriend??? And does “hooking up” with guy friends make me a bisexual or having an attraction for “one-eyed sausages“??? Maybe my grasp of the English language is not on par with someone who has already being immersed with the life and culture of living in a Caucasian country. Saying that I “created lies” is quite a big statement to put for the public to see when people who know me well knows how I pride myself to be an honest and trustworthy person…

This is just dumb and downright petty. In our ensuing tete-a-tete through private messaging, she said she felt embarrassed knowing her friends would know blah blah blah when there was nothing between us. Of course there was nothing between us, why the pettiness over something so trivial then??? I don’t think it would have any adverse effects anyway. I guess studying and subsequently living abroad can transform a person overnight.

Out of respect, she’s already off my list. I don’t need friends like that who don’t value friendship and being extremely vile over a small matter. Embarrassed over something so trivial is just plain silly. She’s not even a great personality or a celebrity in the first place to have such feelings. Imagine what being one would do to her. Well this “annoying” person is bloody annoyed by this episode… 

2 Out Of 3 Isn’t So Bad After All…

It was a heady weekend for me. One of the best I’ve had in my life. It would have been even more magnificent had Chelsea beat Arsenal or even hold them to a draw at The Emirates Stadium on Sunday night. But it didn’t matter. The weekend was still a great one for me personally as things kinda went my way, one way or another.

Last Saturday, Aida and I both decided to confirm and pay a visit to our home renovation contractor’s showroom at Changi Road. Oh in case you dunno by now, we both bought a home for ourselves at Compassvale Street in August and have just collected our keys this past Monday. Two notable local celebrities Nurul Aini and Jai had endorsed our home renovation contractor, based on various adverts you might have seen on television. Yes, it’s none other than Chew Interior Design. But why them???

As I had lamented in a previous entry sometime in 2005, I was not keen on engaging a Malay home renovation contractor company due to the bad experience my family suffered when we moved in to our current home. Delay in completion and shoddy work were the reasons behind it. I don’t like to put down my fellow community’s shortcomings, neither do I like to stereotype, but when you’ve experienced it yourself and hearing others complaining, you can’t help but think that at the end of the day, you only want quality work and satisfaction since after all, you’re gonna be staying in that home for a long time.

Chew Interior Design is quite well-known in our community anyway. Looking through their catalogue, I must say a bulk of their satisfied customers are from our community. There were quite a few designs which we liked and gave us some ideas on how we wanted our home to look like. Looking at the number of things we wanted, we were expecting to pay a bomb, in the region of 50K and above. But the final quotation was way below our estimation. I won’t say how much we are paying but all I can say is, we’re quite happy with the valuation. Now our hope is on them to live up to our expectations. We hope our choice have been proven right since our fave cousins also engaged their services and recommended them to us…

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 F8 TV

I’m in love with this High-Definition Television (HDTV). It is the latest in the Samsung range of HDTVs and is a 52-inch model. Seeing that I have planned for an entertainment room (movies & games) to be built at the study room of my new home, the television would be the focal point of my vision for this room. Its current price reads $10399 at most electronics retail outlets. However, we saw one that was retailing at about $8319 at Harvey Norman Parkway Parade, which was too good to be true. But we are not keen on buying it just yet. As months pass, the price would most definitely drop so we’re still biding till the time is right.

Likewise the Playstation 3 (PS3) console that I have been clamouring to buy. Everywhere I go, most shops are selling it between $759 and $799. This package normally comes with an extra free wireless controller ($66) and a game (between $82 – $135). I saw one shop, also at Parkway Parade offering the best package with two games and an extra free wireless controller for only $750. Again, although it sounded tempting, I have to hold myself back and tell myself that the price would go down sometime down the road. Anyway, to maximise the playing experience of playing the PS3 console, one can only feel it when you have a HDTV. The waiting game goes on for me… *sigh*

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With regards to the title above, it actually described my Sunday more rather than the whole weekend. Firstly, my favourite Manchester United once again showed why they are the champions of England to comprehensibly beat those wannabes from Merseyside, albeit by a single goal. Some people might argue it was down to luck but let’s look at it this way. In life, you create your own luck, the rest is up to HIM. So in that respect, I take the win no matter how scrappy it was. A win is still a win, even if it had ricocheted someone’s bum…

Secondly our very own Hady Mirza was crowned Asian Idol. I’ve got to admit between head and heart, the head had three choices and those three choices did not include his name in the list. Even after watching his performances over the weekend, I could not see how he could upstage the other vocal powerhouses technically. Where he lost out on technique, I guess he won by being the whole package and most definitely for remaining humble unlike Mau & Jac who momentarily did not look pleased after the results were announced. It’s like as though their lives had depended on it. 

We have the online forums and printed media dissecting the various theories and reasons as to how he could have won it. No matter how much some people might not accept it, truth be told, Asia had spoken so they’ve got to live with the choice they made, even if they had made the wrong one or out of pity. Based on how Asia had voted, we can actually see clearly that looks and a humble character goes a long way in winning the hearts of voters in this part of the world as compared to the West.

Perhaps what Imran Ajmain had said in the Life! section of The Straits Times could also be true. He was quoted as saying it could be a divine intervention from above cos before this Hady was never looked as an outright winner. Even the judges, Dick Lee notably, then had made unhappy faces when his name was announced as the winner of the Season 2 Finals. Hopefully this win would be an added boost to Hady‘s career and hopefully he’ll start to sing more Malay songs other than “Merpati” and “Hijau“, which I find very boring whenever I watch his performances live or on television (P.S. I hope no Happy Hady reading this will slam me for being biased in their forum, like the last time cos I’m being objective here… :P). It’s high time he sings with more variety than his normal limited repertoire. I’m happy for him, happy for the community and happy for our country. Another one does the community proud and I look forward to more of it…

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Here’s wishing my Muslim friends and visitors “Selamat Hari Raya Aidiladha“. May this day of blessing bring happiness and more sustenance in your lives…

To Salam Or Not To Salam…???

Listening to Fiza O‘s “Girlfriend” segment today, I can’t help but feel intrigued at how the mind of the fairer gender works. For those who did not get to listen, well the question went like this, “Would you salam (shake the hands) of your boyfriend’s ex if you were to bump into each other???” Quite a number of ladies who responded said they would prefer to avoid and walk away, rather than smile, shake hands and make small talk. Some even went as far as to say they would gloat over the other for being the better woman. Extremely gracious indeed!!!

I don’t like to stereotype, but most ladies I know have this begrudging trait to the point that they do not want to have anything to do with their boyfriend’s ex, neither do they allow them to be in contact, even though it’s within a friendship basis. Actually that’s besides the main point I wanna talk about. I notice that it is also quite difficult for ladies who do not know each other personally to shake the hands of the other when they bump into each other like for example in a working environment and being in different sections or departments. Or in different schools of a particular institution. Sometimes just to get a smile out of them can be quite difficult. Some even eye the other with looks that could kill.

Not guys though. I notice that guys are quite receptive to shaking each others’ hands and make small talk even if they don’t know each other personally or if it’s meeting their girlfriend’s ex (unless he was abusive to her that is). Maybe it’s because we’re so used to it since we have been doing it every Friday at the mosque, shaking the hands of fellow congregators. But yeah I still find it odd for ladies to have this wary trait even towards their own kind. Take it this way, in the case of the scenario that Fiza had put forth, they are already the better woman and their respective men only have the hots for them. So why the grudge??? I don’t think their men would want their ex-es back, even if a wee bit of feelings would somehow return, do they???

I might be a little shallow in this respect since I’ve been a one-woman man and likewise my wife. So we do not have this opportunity to ever be in this scenario. But I would love to hear from a woman’s point of view so I can understand how their mind works, especially with regards to meeting their own gender, whether they happen to be their boyfriend’s ex or someone working in the same building or someone from the same institution.

Closure…

I did not begin my Monday on a good note. Some personal things did not go my way and naturally I was peeved. Bloghopping during lunchtime only made the blood boiled a bit more than it should, and the temperature rising came to a head when I stumbled upon that entry that ignited my creative juices into typing the previous entry. Even though I had contemplated whether to be jumpy and peeved in the first sentence, from the way I wrote overall, I guess I was spitting vile and venom and baying for blood.

With regards to my previous entry yesterday, I believe someone has already read it and responded in kind in her blog. She said she hates conflicts, and I agree wholeheartedly as I also hate it to the core. What started off as something which was meant to end up with happiness for many people, turned out otherwise just because there were suspicions and lack of communication. I believe I made a mistake in scaring her, when I joked once that I would find their old friends right down to the graveyard, which of course was meant as a figure of speech. Unknowingly I did not even realise that one of them had in actual fact passed on, hence the peeve towards my apparent insensitivity.

Though I perfectly understood why she felt the way she did, on why would a total stranger suddenly appear and be so excited about helping out, I believe things could have been done a little more tastefully by getting to know me a bit better, rather than look at me like a total wacko or stalker for that matter. Yeah you can be protective of your friends’ interests and entitled to your own opinions but if it affects morale and spreads unhappiness throughout, we won’t even get to realise our intentions to unite everyone. True, the world will be a boring place if people were to agree with one another but the world will also be a disaster if people do not learn to respect, tolerate and compromise their own differences towards each other.

Personally I hate to prolong this and I certainly thought it was over and done with after I had explained myself to her in a lengthy email sometime towards the end of 2006. Little did I expect this to crop up again a year on. I might have used religion as a way of reasoning in the previous entry but I believe I made sense in what I said and I certainly approached this whole reunion thingy with the love of Islam in mind. I never questioned her faith but to remind herself and also myself that there are more than just the 5 daily prayers that we need to look after. I don’t have to elaborate further. We’re all intelligent and mature, thinking adults to know ourselves.

I accept her apologies and I hope she would move on from this episode, no matter how bitter it is for either of us to swallow. I don’t have any qualms about her joining the Facebook group, in fact I welcome her in if she ever decides to join. And if I had offended her or anyone else in my previous entries on this particular topic, especially with my stinging words, I too would like to apologise. Life is too short to be holding grudges or be affected by trivial matters like these when there are other more important things of precedence that need our attention…

 

Cleanse Your Heart From Suspicions & Ill-Will…

I dunno whether to be all jumpy and peeved when I read someone’s recent blog entry. In it, she said that she had stumbled upon a certain group in Facebook that I was invited to join, and is adopting a wait and see stance before deciding to join. Cos why??? She didn’t want her bad experience joining a previous Yahoo Group to repeat again when she saw that the same member (she did not mention who but definitely was referring to yours truly) is also in the Facebook group.

Last year on 15 December 2006, I typed an entry titled “Sincerity Can Be A Bane“. To summarise what I said in that entry, I was extremely disappointed that my sincerity to help unite old friends was misinterpreted the wrong way. Picture this, they have not met like almost 2 decades and since I was still in contact with a few of them, I went out of my way to try and bring them all together again. But some people in the group made it looked and sounded so elitist and exclusive that outsiders were deemed as groupies and looked upon with utter disdain. I would not have gone out of my way had I not had the permission from the founders of the group to go ahead. And I wasn’t even expecting any acceptances nor accolades to be a part of the group. Far from it. Plus I won’t assist if people did not invite me to do so, bearing in mind there will be unhappy characters who will question a stranger’s motives in the short and long run.

She used the words “Bad Experience“. What “Bad Experience” did I inflict upon the group other than reunite them with about 10 other old friends??? As a Muslim, you should know damn bloody well that helping others to foster silaturrahim is something that is encouraged. No point you blog and say you want to answer the call for prayers (the saying “Tak guna sembahyang tunggang-tonggek” comes to mind) but your heart is still filled with suspicions and ill-will towards others. And you are wearing the Hijab too for God‘s sake!!! Reading her trials and tribulations in life through her writings, I can’t help but sympathise with her but sometimes things like these makes me wonder if they are all retributions on her but I certainly don’t wished them upon her.

One year on from that experience, and those bad thoughts still linger in her head. I wonder who should be referring to it as a “Bad Experience“, me or her??? I dunno if she will be reading this entry but I hope she will cleanse her heart from all these negative thoughts and approach life with less suspicions and think of others in a more positive light. And may Allah forgive her for her misgivings towards me cos really, I dunno what wrong I’ve done to her when I have not even met nor known her personally for her to be so quick to judge me as such. And just for her kind info, I am helping the Facebook group reunite with the whole gang again whether she likes it or not. I gain nothing from all these but personal satisfaction to see old friends get together again, plus my wife qualifies to be a part of this group if it ever evolves to be elitist and exclusive again (which I know it will not, based on its intentions).

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It’s been more than a week since my last entry. I would like to thank all of you who sent your birthday greetings to my daughter Syahindah Adawiyah through comments in this domain, my cross-post Multiply blog as well as personal sms-es. We did not throw her a grand party knowing that she is too young to understand nor appreciate such a celebration. Anyway, Aida and I plus both sets of our families are not keen on a grand-scale celebration. Just like how we were not keen on holding a “Tahniq” (“Cukur Rambut“) ceremony after she was born. In that respect, we uphold our family tradition in keeping things humble and just celebrating it amongst us. At least she still got to cut her cake and received gifts from us.

To see Syahindah‘s mini party at home, please click here.

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Last Saturday (8 December 2007) we went to Ang Mo Kio Central to watch the semi-finals of Band Remix, a competition organised by RIA 89.7FM where groups are supposed to sing a song of their choice in a different genre. Some might say these groups are out to destroy the original versions and from what I heard last year, some of the songs were definitely not pleasing to the ears (my own personal opinion!!!). But this year is so much different. Aida and I were definitely impressed with the competition on show and we were glad that the groups that entered the Final were the ones we liked. Though we did not spend a long time there, it was enough for us to be entertained.

Even Syahindah was dancing and headbanging whilst sitting on her stroller till Aura Shai quipped that she can take over her tag as “The Original Rock Chick” in future. We also made Fiza O a happy person by introducing Syahindah to her, cos all these while, she had been telling us how much she wanted to meet the little one, since we did not get the opportunity to bring her on previous shows. Great semi-finals and I bet the Final itself will be even greater. I’m still contemplating whether to go cos I am expecting something on that night…

A Year Ago & A Year On…

A year ago, I was anticipating the birth of my daughter…

A year ago, I was waiting anxiously in the lounge at Thomson Medical Centre praying for my wife’s safety and my daughter’s smooth delivery…

A year ago, history was made when I became a father for the first time…

A year ago, it felt surreal to finally hold the product of our love in my arms and making the call of prayer into her ears…

A year ago, life became even more meaningful to our lives with the arrival of our newborn…

Syahindah

A year on, she has already learnt how to walk and run…

A year on, she has learnt how to eat like an adult…

A year on, she has learnt how to speak a few words like “Flower“, “Kakak“, “Kuar” (Keluar) and “Car“…

A year on, she has learnt how to dance and shake her booty…

A year on, she remains the family’s pride and joy… Period!!!

Syahindah2

HAPPY 1ST BIRTHDAY DARLING…!!!

You give us unbridled joy and fill our lives with happiness and laughter…

We love you very much…!!!

——– Ayah & Ibu ——–